I’m staying up tonight.

I’m staying up as late as possible tonight because I’m afraid that once I go to sleep I won’t wake up.

No, I’m not predicting my death.  It’s just that lately, it’s taken me incredible will power to drag myself out of bed.  I don’t know what’s come over me.  It’s not like I’m really sick.  I’m not coughing, nor do I have a fever, or anything like that.  Friends have shared their theories.  They all seem to have some validity.  Until I visit the doctor, I won’t really have any substantive clues.  But this whole situation’s got me thinking.

Why do I wake up every morning?

People seem to have their reasons.  Even those who don’t necessarily enjoy life all that much seem to get up each morning and go through the routine of daily living.  The other day I had a conversation with a group of people about life and death, and the general consensus was that living is better than dying.  It seems that most people want to live, at all costs.  Sure, the survival instinct is in all of us.  But most of us aren’t being chased down by a predator, and for sure most of us aren’t living the happy go-lucky life that we all dream about.  So what is it that makes us want to live?  And for a long time?

Is it hope?  Hope of a better life?  Hope for a better future?

Is it purpose?  Do we believe that there is some purpose to our existence?

Is it the fear of death?  Since we don’t really know much about death and what happens thereafter, would we rather live?

I believe a lot of things that directly shape the answers to these questions.  But honestly, lately I wonder if belief is enough.  I admit  I used to have cookie-cutter answers to all of life’s greater questions… but I’ve done away with them because they just weren’t cutting it anymore.  Even though I no longer have neat answers, I guess I think it’s worth asking the questions.

So why do YOU wake up every morning?


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